5 Reasons Why Cookie Lyon is the ISH!!!

Last night the Season Finale of Empire proved that it is the breakout hit of year! I have friends who fall on both sides of the fence about the show. Some love it as a show that depicts the culture. Others find it over the top and have likened it to a soap opera or the Black/Hip Hop Glee (!?!). Such is life. As a Chicagoan, I for one am loving that the show has given so many of my friends work in front of and behind the scenes and seeing my city on the screen each week is pretty darn cool!

But, most won't deny that Taraji Henson kills it as Cookie Lyons! She has already achieved iconic status in popular culture with her signature fashion sense, her witty one-liners and snappy comebacks. Baby girl can READ!!! So, here are my Top 5 Reasons Why Cookie Lyon is the ISH!!!

5.  Cookie is a fashion icon!
Cookie has no fear when it comes to fashion. She can rock a head-to-toe cheetah complete with a pimp hat and dare you to say she ain't shaaaawp!! Her fashion is "timeless"! She goes to jail for 17 years and the outfit that she gets locked up in has time to go out of style and come back in style again! I'm swear I've seen girls rocking that same outfit in the clubs recently.


4. Cookie is "cold-blooded"!
Literally! Cookie can rock a fur coat! PETA be damned, she rocks them indoors, outdoors, day, night, lunchtime . . . . It's not really clear what season (or what year) the show takes place in, but you can best believe that Cookie will swing a fresh fur for you!

3. Cookie is a Musical Genius! 
Hip Hop, R&B, she can even do Alternative with Elle Dallas (Courtney Love)! After 17 years in prison, with little influence from popular culture she can still comeback and slay the hits.

2. Cookie's Broom Game is Nice!
Cookie is from the old school where when a Mama needed to WHOOP a child she would grab what ever was closest - a broom, a shoe, a hairbrush . . . Her son Hakeem thought he was a Hip Hop superstar until he met her broom game. Don't play with Cookie!

And the #1 reason why Cookie is the ISH . . .

1. Cookie Is For The Kids!!!
You know you've reach the top when Vulture makes a paper doll in your honor! The doll doesn't exactly look like Taraji P. in the face but it definitely captures her essence and her most memorable outfits - cheeky cheetah, boardroom lingerie, they even include the broom! I'm printing mine today! You can get yours and have a good ole time producing records, fighting with BooBoo Kitty or otherwise reliving your favorite moments from the season.  Get yours here!

Not sure if Cookie Lyon is invited but come on now, a paper doll! You gotta admit, that's hot!

Damon Dash . . . You Are Cordially Invited

The internet is still buzzing from Dame Dash’s interview on The Breakfast Club on Friday with Charlemagne The God and DJ Envy.  Dame basically s#!% on their lives because they have a boss. 

"I hustle for my last name, not for my first."

Ouch! Shout out to everybody who is employed out there!!! He came for you . . . us!

The initial clip that everyone posted and reposted over the weekend paints Dame as the "bad guy", snapping again. He was there to promote his newest project, an independent film, Loisadas, but the conversation kept getting off-track. The radio personalities kept trying to ask him about his former partner, Jay-Z. 

He let them have it and the full interview shows more of why. Dame reminded us that the old Roc-A Fella days are over 15 years ago and he felt that rehashing questions about that time and entertaining gossip was disrespectful. It no doubt struck a nerve. 

Frankly, I thought that it was cool that he talked to them about the mindset and mentality of a "boss", but I also thought it was too extreme to challenge the guys' manhood simply because they don't share the same world view. 

"Calling another man boss is like calling him Daddy"!

"Jobs are for people who are too lazy to invest in themselves"

"Real men don't talk about other men"

So how could someone who does that get invited? Well,  many of you know I have a fabulous soiree . . . in my mind . . . attended by all my favorite celeb friends. Dame is invited because it's no fun if everyone thinks the same. I actually really like when I am at a get together and happen upon a lively discussion/debate about anything from the trivial and the important.  

He's also invited because he makes a good points. 

- In today’s society, with user-friendly technology the internet it is easier than ever for the average yo to be a boss.

- Working a 9 to 5 everyday just to have to ask someone when you can take a vacation or a sick-day does make you feel like less than a (wo)man.

- A Good Woman Makes Everything Better. 

Most importantly, he is invited BECAUSE he's a boss.  I need more people like that in my life.  I really admire people who set out to do it their own way. Dame's career has certainly had it's highs and lows, but, who better to learn from that someone who 's experienced both. Someone who picks himself up and keeps on grinding.

So, Damon Dash, You Are Invited! The invitation has already been sent, simply awaiting a reply. 

Oh, and uh, . . . I Promise We Won't Bring Up Jay-Z. He'll be there anyway,

Peace (and Prosperity),

CD

If you haven't seen it. Catch the full interview here.

Death of a Diva

"High heels are pleasure with pain"

---Christian Louboutin

I don’t go out much. But when I do, I am well past the age of feeling like I need to be uncomfortable for the sake of fashion. But there I was, at a friend’s birthday party this weekend, nearly doubled-over in pain, wincing, hobbling through the venue like a ninety-year old woman. Well, not really. That’s just how I felt in my shoes. Shoes that will never be worn again! Not by me.

It wasn’t that they were too small, I don’t play that! It was something about the width or the shape or the style of the top of the shoe . . .  I’m not sure, but it was a mess!

All I could think about was, “How AM I HERE”!?! I know better.  I buy my size, I buy quality, I walk in heels on the regular! I am the teacher who silently pities the girls who show up to prom in heels they’re wearing for the first time, walking tenuously like balancing on stilts.  Poor things, I bet now I’ll empathize more .  . .

But that ain’t me! I love a good heel. Heels always help to elongate my 5’4’’ stature. They make me taller, thinner. They put that dip in your hip, that switch in your sway, that sass in your . . .
The higher the heel, the closer to GAWD! Needless to say, I like a good heel! This night was no different, I got dressed and was feeling pretty good about my self. I even took a bathroom selfie! BAM! I put on the heels and awakened The Diva! I was ready for the night!

“How AM I HERE”, I shouted as my feet screamed!!!

How I guess it happens when you don’t go out much and you take your fashion cues from blogs. It happens when you buy online. It happens when you’re the kind of person who receives shoes in the mail, tries them on only one foot (the left), feels satisfied and then throws them in the closet . . . for months.  

It was my right shoe that betrayed me, that made me sit it out when they played “The Wobble”. It was the right shoe that made me silently beg for mercy as I stood during the tributes and acknowledgements. It was the right shoe that made me move past the appetizers, hungry though I was, because I couldn't manage eating, walking, talking, smiling and hiding my pain all at one time.
Too many sensations. It was the right shoe that did me wrong and made me end my night.

 

Sexy swagger. Spent.

Diva. Dead.

Had it not been snowing, I would have walked to my car barefoot!

Cause of Death

Oops!!!

Who's Invited!?! My "A -List" New Year's Eve Party!

It’s New Year’s Eve!!! As so many of you hit the streets to “Turn Up” (2013’s most annoying phrase --- that I can’t stop saying), I’ll be laying low this year and kicking back.  What better time to play one of my favorite games --- one that my friend Puni and I call, “Who’s Invited”!?!

When it comes to celebrities, I am not an Idol Worshiper!  When we talk about celebrities, we talk about them in terms of who we think would be the most fun at a party, who would you most like to hang out or shop with. Who is cool.

It basically goes like this . . .  you decide on the venue, the occasion and then tell who would make the guest list.  My event would look like the New Year’s Eve Dinner Party from the movie Brown Sugar.  But better, bigger, on an island maybe or in a penthouse, with the ubiquitous long table that’s in every dinner party scene. It’s an intimate gathering with good food and drink in an environment where people can talk and laugh.  It’s a casual affair. People can wear jeans and sparkles.  J

So, who makes the list? For me it’s people whose private personality seems just as interesting as their public persona. So here goes . . .

Beyonce and Jay-Z – You already know. I have to have Forbes’ Highest Earning Celebrity Couple at the Par-tay! They are not invited for their celebrity status, but truly I think they are interesting. They travel, support causes, they read, I’m sure they have interesting stories to tell . . . if they’ll tell ‘em!

Sandra Bullock – Why you ask? I just like her.  Anyone who gets publicly humiliated the way that she was by her ex-husband, quickly gets herself together, then “pimp struts” outta there like Angela Bassett setting the car on fire in Waiting to Exhale and never look back . . .  That’s a cold piece right there!!! She can bring the kid too. He can play with Laila.

Kevin Hart – Is he having the Best Year (or few years) EVER or what!!! It’s been a long time coming and he seems to have a funny take on all of it. I’ll just need him to use his inside voice.

Robert De Niro – I think he is so New York. I think he is so cool. Enough said. I imagine him having a drink after the dinner. He might even take his shoes off while he’s talking. Bring the wife!

John Legend – Not only is he an amazing talent. He supports causes that I admire and he produces films that have substance. I know he and his wife Chrissy would be fun at a party and who knows, he might just jump on the piano too (yeah, there’s a piano there)!

Jilly from Philly (Jill Scott) – That’s Jill Scott for those who don’t know.  I haven’t heard much from her lately.  I need her to come through so that we can catch up!

Gabrielle Union and Dwayne Wade – Yes. They are invited.  I think my guests are classy enough not to ask about the latest scandal involving them – although they will be watching their body language . . . bet that!

Regina King – I’ve known her since my childhood and she continues to reinvent herself.  I feel like she was missed in the latest films, but out of all the Gabby-Sanaa-Nia-Taraji Black Actress crew she’s been around the longest and might have some stories. Plus, I wanna know what happened with Theo Huxtable!?!?

Will Ferrell – I just think he would be fun. In some interviews he seems so over Hollywood. But he also seems like the type that can’t finish a story without cracking “his-own-self” up! Love that.

Dave Chappelle – He has been on the guest list for years . . . and he ain’t coming off! He will have to come

all the way from obscurity in Ohio for the party but I know that he’ll have fun stuff to talk about.  The only thing would be getting the other Hollywood types to leave HIM alone because he is still (low-key) your favorite comedian’s favorite comedian!

Ahmir “?uestlove” Thompson – Have you ever read his celebrity stories!?! THE BEST EVER!!! Not because he’s talking about celebrities but the way in which he talks about his encounters with them.  Some he is simply in awe of some and not for the reasons you’d think (like Prince), and some he artfully shows them as “on bullshit”, on some “hollywood shit”, or on some “disrespectful shit” in a very relatable sort of way. I KNOW he’ll have great stories to tell. Don’t believe me? Then check out his description of Will Smith’s house: http://curbed.com/archives/2011/07/28/roots-drummer-uestlove-pens-epic-tribute-to-will-smiths-house.php

Idris Elba – Aside from being distractingly handsome, I think he would be fun.  He’s been in some stand out films, he knows music, he has an accent, three things that definitely take your party's “cool factor” up a few

notches. He can bring a date . . . I guess.

Ben Stiller – There’s Something About Mary, Meet the Parents, Zoolander and his latest movie about one of the classics from my “literary childhood”!!! Never takes himself so seriously that he can’t try something new.  I know he has some stories to tell! He can bring the wife and kids too. And his parents!!!

Mary J and husband Kendu – Of course, I can’t have a party without my homegirl! Imagine her and Robert De Niro in conversation! Love it!

So, there’s my New Year’s Eve Dinner Party. I chose people that are so busy that you don’t often imagine them “sitting down”.  I am intrigued by what they must be like at those moments.  Surely my guest list would change if I were planning a Ladies Night Out or a Super Bowl Party or some other kind of shin dig but this is my “A-list” kick back.  My reality show favs are not invited to this one. 

Now tell me, who would you invite? And to what? What kind of soiree would you invite your celebrity “friends” to and why?

Have fun, be safe out there, and see you in 2014!

15 Things I've Learned on the Journey to 40!

As I celebrate my 40^th Birthday, I can’t help thinking that I am sooooo not the same girl I was at 20, 25, and in some ways even 30, but in many ways I am! Below I’ve compiled a list of the things that I know to be truth.  It took me 40 years to get here – don’t judge me!

1.        Trust your instincts. – That’s why you have them.  I can attribute the many missteps in my life to ignoring that inner voice that told me better!

2.        No one is all one thing (Thanks K.Ford). – It’s the truth. Even someone who is rotten as hell has some redeeming qualities . . . somewhere. Likewise, that sweet grandma on your block has a skeleton or two in her closet. People are dynamic and complex . . .  a mixed bag of crazy! Word!

3.        Don’t feel sorry for yourself. No one will join you in that. – That pity party you’re planning will only have a guest list of one. Ain’t nobody got time for that!!!

4.        Behavior Breeds Behavior. – If you come at a person with attitude, you stand a 95.9% chance of getting that attitude right back. On the flip side though, if someone is giving it to you and you react with calm, it confuses them and they calm the hell down too! It’s amazing to watch.

5.        If you don’t like it, fix it! – This year my brother-in-law will celebrate his 50^th  . . .  but with braces on his teeth. His motto is why walk around wishing things were better, make it better! Message!

6.         Don’t compare your life to others – This is just one of the reasons that Facebook is the devil. People will post their best, smiliest, thinnest, most fabulous pics on purpose and have you thinking that something is wrong with your life. Just remember, that they probably won’t post pics of their bad hair days, stacked up laundry, credit card statements, past due bills, etc. You’re all right!

7.         “Praise even the leaves” – I heard this years ago and it just means that before the flowers bloom, before the fruit ripens, praise even the leaves on the tree. It may not be your time yet. Be grateful for the season you are in, it might just be a time of divine preparation!

8.        Say what you mean and mean what you say – People can be slow. So, don’t leave your words and your meaning up to interpretation. Because, um, well . . . good luck with that.

9.        Real parenting makes you neurotic – Did I put too many clothes on her? Is she wearing her sweater? Did she eat all of her lunch? Is this the right school for her? Sheesh!

10.    You can’t hide from yourself.  Everywhere you go, there you are! – The guru, Teddy Pendergrass, told us this. If a person is shady in their business, they are probably shady in relationships, at home, etc, etc. Pay attention, people are telling you who they are all the time. You just have to listen.

11.    Shine and Let Shine – I love being around fabulous people. But if you are truly fabulous then you love to see others shine too! Never be too full of yourself to give a compliment or to help someone shine. You’ll shine brighter too.

12.    Haters gon’ hate! That’s what they do!!! – You will waste valuable time and energy worrying about what people think of you, or trying to get people to like you . . . especially if it ain’t in them do so. I’m a people pleaser so it took me a minute to get here. Who knows why they hate you --- you think it’s your fabulousness but truthfully, deep down, it ain’t really even about you.  It’s kinda like being ugly! It’s really not gonna change unless something drastic happens (matter of fact, it’s exactly like being Ugly)!!! 

13.    In love, it’s okay to be different – He’s Duck Dynasty. I’m Real Housewives. As long as you both want the same things – a happy home, love and respect, hot butt naked sex . . . you’ll be alright!!!

14.    It’s easy to be average. – There are plenty of role models and examples to follow.

15.    Happiness is a choice . . . That YOU make!!!  - If you’re looking for that time in life when there are no troubles, if you’re looking for that person who helps you find your “happy”, new car, house, etc.  --- Good Luck!!! The goal is to possess your joy in spite of all.

Now get out there and find your “sunshine”!! That’s an order! J

She Was Wheat Bread, When Wheat Bread Wasn’t Cool!

I was in the grocery store the other day and saw a woman with a cart full of white bread – 5 or 6 loaves at least. All I could think was, “Damn, they still sell that!” I can’t remember the last time I had (much less bought) a slice of white bread.  Honestly, I really never developed a taste for it – thanks to Mama.

You see, my mother was ALL ABOUT wheat bread, when wheat bread wasn’t cool – she was about that life!

She was into vitamins, herbs, whole grains, lean proteins, and carrot juice way before it was trendy.  She used to send us on school field trips with sandwiches on bread that was sure to be ridiculed – she used that hearty bread, not the cute wheat bread they sell now.  On a Friday night she just might bust out the juicer and we would all get carrot or apple juice “wasted”.  And naturally, Abdul’s children didn’t eat no pork, so we always had the cheese pizza at parties, a turkey sandwich instead of ham, chicken salad instead of tuna, or BEEF bologna for lunch. And, the brown rice we ate with dinner seemed so different than the white rice we had at school, at restaurants, or with relatives.  I used to dream of white rice!!!

Of course as kids we couldn’t appreciate what she was trying to do back then.  She had to endure all our protests and pleas. It wasn’t really that we didn’t like it – well, we did really hate the Buckwheat Pancakes - we protested mostly because it made us feel different.  As kids, all we wanted was to be like everyone else.  We couldn’t wait to start our own lives and buy our own groceries.

But lo and behold --- wouldn’t you know it --- now you can’t escape it! You can’t watch television without seeing commercials for products that boast about Whole Grains. School lunches offer turkey sausage for breakfast instead of pork now.  Odwalla, Naked, and others are killing the game with their fruit smoothies and vegetable blends that you can buy right in the grocery store.  A few friends and I were just talking at a kid’s birthday party about which brand of juicer is best. And brown rice . . . . it’s so popular now, Uncle Ben’s even has an instant (not sure if that’s an oxymoron, though) .

Really Mom, you were ahead of your time.

So Mom, this Mother’s Day I raise my glass of carrot juice to you! For all the wheat bread, brown rice, carrot juice, Tiger’s Milk candy bars, Carob cakes, and herbal teas, thank you!!!

So now tell me, what did your Mom do when you were growing up that you didn’t appreciate until you were an adult (or a parent)? What are you doing now that your kids can’t appreciate yet? Moms Rock!!! Happy Mother’s Day!!!

Dedicated to my mom, Delores Daniel a.k.a. Lois, Memphis Dawn, LoLo, Dee, Mama D, Grandma Lores! Happy Mother's Day!!